Schmuck for President
HomePlatformClosing Notes
Author of upcoming book entitled
A Schmuck's-Eye View
The ONLY candidate who will tell you up-front that he really is a SCHMUCK!!!
 After all, it takes a real Schmuck to beat the bushes.
 If you are tired of Skulls without brains, wait till you get a load of me.
   
  1. Bring OUR troops HOME. I'm thinking if a lot of uniforms and guns aren't pointing at other folks all the time, well, those folks are less likely to point guns at us.
    1. If, however, some sort of loons DO attack, then we go stomp a brand new mud-hole in them & come home.
    2. The United States taxpayers do NOT pay to 'rebuild' the loons who attacked. Hey, if THEY have to pay for housing, they will not have money for howitzers.
  2. Total LEGALIZATION of Marajuana, Peyote and Mushrooms. These grow from the ground; they are God's way of saying She's sorry.
  3. Total Inclusion of GAYS, LESBIANS, etc. in the Military and Marriage. See Reason 3 on 10 Reasons to Elect me President. Everyone has the right to build their own prision. Think about it.
  4. Secure OUR borders. Look, there is NOTHING wrong and EVERYTHING right about LEGAL IMMIGRATION. But, what is happening right now is NOT. It is a fact and we all darn well know it.
    1. We ALREADY have all these trained people in the military who are experts at desert encounters. We have Texas, New Mexico, Arazona and Southern California. Work it out.
  5. Taking ALL the Super SUV's such as the HumVee, the Escalade, and whatever else there may be OFF the 'Commercial' vehicle lists. If you want one, fine, okay, YOU pay for it. And 'Commercial' vehicles are Tax Deductable because they weigh so much. No reason for a bunch of teachers, nurses, cooks, etc. to pay for YOUR obese ride.
    1. A MUCH better review by the IRS to make darn sure all 'commercial fuel deductions' ARE for REAL commercial activities and NOT driving the company car to a weekend in the mountains, or riding around in your Humvee, Arnie.
  6. Government Paid Health Care. Look, if it's good enough for Congress, it's good enough for the rest of U.S.
  7. REAL Presidential Advocacy of Alternative Electricity Generation; Geo-thermal, Tidal, Wind, etc. My God, Thermal and Wind powered generators ringing Washington D.C. could power the East Coast with all the hot air produced there. Also, REAL advocacy of alternate fuel research for transportation.
    1. If we could economically and efficiently really harness the power of methane, we could cut pollution AND our dependance on oil by a LOT!!! You know it and I know it. And it would give ranchers and farmers a cash crap, er, a cash crop all year long,
    2. And after ALL the methane has been harvested, the remaining, ah, real-doo could be used to help power a bio-mass converter and help heat and light a school. With enough research, I'll BET it could be done. A great reason to USE a pooper-scooper when 'patrolling' with a productive pooch, yes?
  8. I will be the ANTI-CHANGE President. I'm all for PROGRESS; change is NOT progress. Earthquakes, hurricanes, floods are CHANGE (right, New Orleans?); air-conditioning & deodorant are PROGRESS. Wouldn't it be nice to have an President who knows the difference?
free counter
Copyright . Dwight Schmuck. All rights reserved.
GoDaddy.com